I’m a big fan in the concepts of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, which basically states (in the most simple terms) that we are controlled not by what happens to us, but by what how we process what happens to us. This bit of knowledge has helped me to no end, to learn to focus on the “automatic” behavioral patterns that are so destructive to ones everyday life, so that the patterns that keep you from being the kind of person that you’d like to be can be controlled and revised as necessary.

Required reading, if this sounds like something that you’d be interested in learning more about, here are a few suggestions)

http://www.hackyourself.org